I could not make sense of it in relative terms. Instead of going into fight mode and kill the cancer as well as my immune system I decided I needed to come to a peace within myself and learn what this experience had to teach me. Yes I would do everything in my power to be well and to heal but the rest was beyond my control. I needed to surrender to whatever my destiny had in store for me. I looked at this experience as a gift – the gift of transformation.

I decided to appreciate every moment I was alive. I decided to publish Bound by Destiny. It had been sitting collecting dust for 15 years. Hal and I decided to travel to beautiful and spiritual places. I opened my heart to love and forgiveness and let go of blame and guilt and judgement. I can honestly say I have had a fulfilling and amazing life and have no regrets.

I talked about past life karma in the book and how it creates our present life karma. I do believe however that we choose how much karma we are willing and able to take on before we come into this life. If we are really brave we may take on a lot and when we get here, it may seem like too much. But keep in mind we did choose it and it is for our evolution.

So, hopefully, we will learn our lessons and burn off all our karma and reach enlightenment quickly. Who knows how long that will take.

I’m up for the challenge. Are you?

Here are some other great reviews:

“I found Bound by Destiny a riveting read . . . by using diary entries and letters along with a narrative account of her current life, we get a deeply personal view . . . the use of past life sessions raises interesting questions as to the boundedness of the individual. For Ross, past life memories clearly provide a rich source of material from which to work on her present life dilemmas. She recognizes emotional patterns that provide a thread through many lives . . ..”

Dr. Fiona Bowie, Exploring the Afterlife.blogspot.co.uk -Honourary Research Fellow in Social Anthropology at the University of Bristol, UK and Member of the Afterlife Research Centre (ARC)

“One of the finest and most honest books I have read. It is so true. It has reinforced all that I have learned.”

Sanjay Rath, astrologer

“. . . an intriguing tale of love spanning many lifetimes and traumas. The true tale of a woman – who through her personal search and commitment to get answers and solutions, both in this life and past lives, has achieved – finally – her true love and partner. And future lives? We’ll have to wait for the sequel!”

Dr. Georgina Cannon – Author, Host on ShirleyMacLaine.com and Founder of the Ontario Hypnosis Centre.

“Bound by Destiny by Kathleen Ross, illuminates the intricacies of love and life, its wonderful highs and its dark, heavy lows. It reflected back to me a time when I went through similar experiences – finding the “one,” chaos and guilt, hurt and pain, marriage and breakups, children suffering.

What brought me farther along my own path was experiencing vicariously through Kathy, the inner knowing and trust that she showed for her inner guidance. Her tenacity, no matter the odds, to seek the truth and close the loop on a long time sorrow, isolation and defeat. Bravo, Kathy.”

Audry Mairi, author of Trager for Self Healing.

“A rare glimpse into what one individual has experienced through many lifetimes. This is an amazingly honest account of Kathy’s present life, intermingled with wide open views of past lives. Kathy vividly weaves into the story descriptions of very diverse past lives, from being a slave boy in Egypt, a monk in India, a distressed mother in Russia, and even a Nazi officer. It ties together previous life experiences with the present, which gives one an holistic view and whole new perspective on living. Kathy’s book brings home in an ordinary sense the role of karma in our lives. It gave me a feeling that we are all familiar with the different roles we play and the emotions that go with them, resulting in a timeless connection with all other souls, from the individual to the whole. This wipes out the reaction to judge others as we are all woven into the same fabric.

I especially enjoyed the sayings of Ezekiel at the first of every chapter. They are inspiring and enlightening. Kathy helps us identify with living an ordinary life from a spiritual all-encompassing perspective.

Being a fellow meditator I enjoyed the references to TM and could identify with Kathy’s thought and her struggle to always search for the right thing to do and her diesire to be true to herself but not cause harm to anyone else.

I totally enjoyed reading this book. The scenes from past lives were very well described. It gave me a wonderful new understanding and acceptance of my own life.”

Marilyn Ma

“I simply could not put this book down once I started to read. It is a candid, amazingly detailed chronicle of Kathy’s past lives shared with her husband Hal. This is not fiction but a true account of the memories that surfaced when Kathy was ready to face and resolve repeating unproductive patterns in this lifetime. Not only is it a good read and a true life romance, but there are many life lessons in these stories that help one to understand issues we face in current relationships. Why do the same types of conflicts (or attractions) surface again and again in relationship after relationship? Why does someone we barely know seem familiar? The answers lie much deeper than childhood experiences or old patterns. I highly recommend it!”

Helen Ann

So there is another book in me about what happened next since it has been 15 years since I married my soul mate. And yes we are still together and grateful to have found each other. But the challenges were huge when we were faced with navigating through angry ex’s, sad children and unfulfilled careers. Society and most of our friends at the time did not support our decision to leave our families to embark on a spiritual journey together. They thought we were selfish and cruel. At times we were labelled insane and because we meditated we had to be members of a cult. Hal and I were there for each other in so many ways – the guilt almost crushed us – the pain of seeing our loved ones suffer at times was unbearable.

But for the first time in our lives, were felt free to be truly ourselves. We knew deep down that our love was unconditional and we could make it through no matter what. What was so great was that we had the awareness to recognize our soul connection and not deny it.  We then had the courage to follow through despite all the negative voices yelling at us to maintain the status quo and sacrifice completely for the good of the unit.

In Bound by Destiny, I talk about how I lived many lifetimes lost and afraid and died young. I had known Hal in most of them but he could never choose to be there for me. So the way karma works is that life presents situations where  major lessons need to be learned so that you won’t repeat the same damaging patterns from your past. Hal and I know now that we decided to take on a major chunk of karma this lifetime to shorten the reincarnation cycle. Still, we had no idea that choosing to be together would only be the beginning of the major challenges and lessons we had yet to experience. Hal needed me to transition from his earlier addictions to alcohol, conflict and being a pleaser. I needed him when I was faced with a life-threatening disease that could very well shorten my life this time around.

I learned to let go of expectation and am trying to accept things the way they are. I feel good about myself and I am certain this is the first lifetime where I can say that and mean it. Transcendental Meditation has been the vehicle for my transformation in this lifetime and I am exceedingly grateful that I recognized its value 37 years ago and never missed a day since to find the silence. Despite the challenges I am the happiest I have ever been.

Hal and I have been through it all – literally. Nothing can stop us now!

“The harmony of your life will carry you through any roughness. Life is essentially equilibrium. The frequency of the vibrational energy is constant and soothing. If we remain in tune and on course then the choppy waves of unresolved energy remain discordant and unattached to the stronger, consistent element. Eventually, when the calm and stillness moves from the centre into the undulating outside forces, then they too will be still. It is like smoothing our wrinkles on an unmade bed. From the centre, resonating to the outside edge, all negativity falls silent as it is pushed into the void. We witness and observe life. We see and experience from the position of student always. But we never become involved in the process of learning, only the lesson it teaches. After all, it is only a process and not worthy of our attention. That is how the negative grows. We give too much credence to the process. Our energy becomes captured, stolen, because we are judging the process of our human experience. We need to be aware that we can be sidetracked by the exciting and dramatic experience. We desire the sensation. We desire the pulsation of irregular vibration because it enlivens the senses. But soon we are tired. We have expended our energy to encompass the outer limits of imagination. We have created a dynamic to shake us from our still centre. This is not necessary for our evolution. We need not be entertained by the illusionary forces. Sensation is temporary and draining. We sing on key with the chord of life. We harmonize with the music of the universe. To sing off key is to cause the harmony to waver, causing a ripple in the infinite calm. We resonate from Self. Our song of love is sung to the Absolute which is bliss, the perfect note of inner peace.”

I believe as we grow in consciousness, we must face our issues and perhaps also our dark side. How do we do this? Through our relationships of course. Our relationships mirror the lessons we need to learn. For most human beings those lessons probably include letting go of ego and control. I don’t think I have met any human that doesn’t want things to go their way. Another tough one is admitting your own role in the situation, saying you were wrong or sorry and you may have made a mistake. I find it curious why this seems so impossible for most. Could it be that it is too painful for us to look at our dark side and accept responsibility for our actions? Surely, we all want to be looked upon as the good person. But how can we better ourselves if we never admit to our mistakes? Without going into the details about what happened in Kauai, I will say this, when you are with a group of people consisting of leaders and no followers, you’re bound for trouble.

Don Miguel Ruiz and his son write about how we are all watching our own movie in their book The Fifth Agreement. Everyone has their own perception of the movie called life. So then how can we judge, how can we make assumptions and how can we take anything personally?  It really is all about acceptance.  When we are enlightened, we become observers of our action and everyone else’s.  So while we are living out our last lives here on the planet, we are still getting embroiled in the drama. Why? Because it is easier to blame someone or something outside ourselves for our predicament.  Ruiz writes, “Your happiness is up to you, and it depends on how you use the word. If you get angry and use the word to send emotional poison to someone else, it appears that you are using the word against that person, but you are really using the word against yourself. That action is going to create a like reaction, and that person is going to go against you.”

While in Kauai, I also talked to some people who read Bound by Destiny and were eager to share their views. It seems the book brought up different issues in different people.  Many had been through similar experience in this life and one woman said reading the book brought up extreme emotions which she would rather leave in the past. We all like to think we can leave painful emotions behind and forget about them.  But if we react emotionally to anything, the emotion is being felt for a reason, perhaps to get us to the other side, where we can feel whole again. Feel it and let it go. Feel it and let it go, until you feel only equanimity.

I remember listening to the audio tape of the past-life regression recalling my life as a Nazi. Every time I listened to the tape I would cry but each time I cried a little less until I could listen to it without emotion. When I got past the emotion, I could actually be grateful for the experience.  But accepting our dark side doesn’t mean accepting the behaviour. It means knowing next time you can be the best person you can be.

The energy on Kauai is so powerful that the Dalai Lama believes that the island is where our souls enter and leave the Earth. So why wouldn’t we become more aware of the amazing gift of human nature and our ability to transform from dark to light?

Thank you, Kauai.

“Yes it is time to start the book. However, you must be clear on what the message of the book is and to weave the tapestry of knowledge. Don’t be worried that if too much is revealed it will leave you vulnerable or open to judgement. The truth never draws negative vibrations against you, only deception and half-truths. In order to share the message of love and truth and enlightenment, you must share the most intimate details of your life with no trepidation. If you cannot do this it means that you view your life without real meaning and the lessons you have learned irrelevant. People respect those who are not afraid to tell the truth. As for decorum, Kathy has a way of revealing the truth gently, with humour and insight. This is why the book will be in support of Kathy creatively, financially and critically. She will tell the story with honesty but also integrity. Some details do not need to be told. These, of course, are the private details of the inner mind. It will become evident what can remain private and what needs to be revealed to keep the reader’s interest. This is not a half project. This is all-encompassing. These are the patterns of your lives. These patterns encompass the physical, the psychological, the spiritual. the causal, the astral. They stretch beyond the limitation of human boundaries. We need not bind ourselves with societal expectation and ritual. It is time to grow far beyond that. We are exquisite light beings open to the world for all to see and know. Be brave. Your courage will be rewarded a thousand fold.

Within my experience of remembering past lives, a common thread appeared. In one lifetime my lover and I were from different class stations. In another lifetime, although we lived together, I was constantly ill. In yet another lifetime we were the same sex! And in others we were doctor and patient, priest and nun.  The societal and moral obstacles created an unbridgeable chasm.  Happiness and authenticity were never choices we were allowed to make. So, in this lifetime, a similar scenario was arranged, but even though a choice existed, it was just as impossible.

So looking at your life in a multi-lifetime perspective opens up so many more possibilities.  Your lover in this lifetime could have been your spouse in a past life. So in the grand scheme of things, who is your first loyalty? It seems all our roles as mother, child, spouse, friend have been mixed up over lifetimes, all so we can learn about ourselves.  Our relationships teach us the most about ourselves and that is why we are here. The more we learn, the more we evolve  and the truest lesson is to love Self and that love will extend to everyone around us.